Do you ever have those dreams that just kinda go on and on, that are about nothing or nobody you know…it’s just a bizarre conglomeration of all sorts of memories, passing thoughts, random places and events, and just general lunacy? Yeah, me neither. OK, I have those all the time. They’re usually a whole lot of bizarro fun! When I can remember them, I write them down or talk about them on a voice memo/dictaphone.

Today, I tried an experiment…putting one of those stupid, ridiculous, random dreams in song form. You know how sometimes when you first wake up, you’re in this quirky weird mood and you start making up goofy songs? Oh, just me…Wow. I should see a therapist. *sigh* Anyway, this little ditty was conceived in such a manner. Early morning commute, singing into my tape recorder.

Just reading these absurd lyrics should show you what kind of a messed-up dream I had! Ohhhhh but the song…what a way to begin 2012. With what is quite possibly the dumbest song I have ever recorded. But it’s catchy!!

The song’s called “Sugar Booger”. WHAT???? Yeah. That’s what I mean. Random. My grandmother used to call me sugar booger when I was little, just a funny little pet name. So I guess that’s where that comes from….

No clue about the lions, attack ants, grocery store, and saw mill. All I know is that Sugar Booger runs a saw mill, and he tames lions, and apparently can command ants to come out and raid picnics. Oh, and he’s weird looking.

LISTEN TO THE SONG

Here are the stupid lyrics so you can sing along:

Sugar Booger was a unique man
a thousand ant piles at his command
when he snapped his fingers and
he wiggled his toes they would all come out of their holes…
well he marched em on down to the picnic site
them unhappy campers never could get a bite
Sugar Booger was a scavenging delight

Sugar Booger
he talked to the animals
he was really nice
you didn’t ask him twice
he could even translate to vegetable

Sugar Booger
he roamed from place to place
he sorta looked like a dog with the legs of a frog
he was a freak of the human race

Sugar Booger
Ran a big saw mill
just a grindin up stumps and a shreddin up clumps
and he took em up on the hill

Sugar Booger went to the grocery store
His lions needed food so he bought em some more
when the little cubs got a taste of the grub
they started running all around the floor

Sugar Booger
Went to jail that day
His lionesses made too many messes
but they were just trying to play

Lyrical genius coupled with an unparalleled musical arrangement and a stellar vocal performance. I think this is a Grammy hit song.

Gotta love the little ARP string  “solo” in the middle

So there you go, a weird song about a weird dream! Good luck getting it out of your head…LOL!

Happy New Year!

MooT

I just awoke from a very disturbing dream. The whole thing felt familiar; It was like watching a movie, only with me in it. From what I can tell, the whole thing was shaped by the music that was in my ears. I’m a habitual listener of music to fall asleep by…

This time I put my iPod on shuffle rather than playing through one of my many “sleepy time” playlists. I’ll tell you what was playing in a second.

The thing began with me driving through this (strangely familiar) shopping center, which had a really convoluted parking lot. There was a hair salon (a corporate one like SuperCuts) on one end, and at the other end, another one, which was always closed for some reason, and I was looking to get a haircut. I’d had a good experience with the one that was always closed (guess it was open some time!), and there was a fast food place next to it that I liked to go to, which had now been replaced by a different one that had a menu which was mostly blank. I kid you not. Everything I asked them did they have was met with a “no, sorry, not anymore…”!

[1] So I went across the parking lot to the other hair place, and was met by rude employee after rude employee. After they finally finished taunting and ridiculing my current state of hair, one of them finally relented and agreed to cut my hair. I looked down at the dude’s feet, and he was wearing sandals, which was not a good look…his feet were are mangled and had the appearance of baked chicken! This is where it started to get stranger and stranger.

Walking out of the hair cut place, it suddenly turned into a video store, and it took me forever to get out of there – it was like a maze! Next, I found myself either in a church or a school…It seemed familiar (I’m pretty sure I have had dreams involving this building before), and I was wandering the halls late one night, [2] going in and out of doors for no apparent reason, turning off lights…I guess I was locking things up for the night. I have no idea. I don’t even know why I was there in the first place. The walls, even the ceilings, were covered in this dark walnut paneling. Something spooked me though, and I pulled out my phone and started checking my Twitter (I’m a Tweetaholic), which in the dream gave me almost magical abilities…I was able to defy gravity and leap between walls and ceilings, off ledges and whatever…as long as I was on Twitter. Hey, I said it was weird. For some reason doing this seemed to make me feel better, and soon I was outside of this building and in a college somewhere.

From what I gather, I must have been a student at this college…this is where the details get fuzzy. I’m kind of glad to tell you the truth…it was some messed up stuff. Somehow I got in the middle of a murder mystery (a real one)…there was a girl on campus whose friend had gotten killed, and she was seeking revenge, justice, or something…apparently the perpetrator hadn’t been caught. She came to me with all this “evidence” that she needed to prove that a certain person was responsible, and as much as I didn’t want to be involved, I got caught up in the whole thing, and found myself going to the courthouse to try and recover this document, or argue her case, or something…I’m fuzzy on why I was there.[3]

I looked at my clock. The time was 6:08 PM – the courthouse closed at 6 PM, but I could still see people inside…so I tried the door. It opened. The officer at the front desk immediately grabbed me and handcuffed me to the desk. I wasn’t disturbed by this, because apparently I had once worked there, and that was protocol for anyone coming in after hours. A security guard saw me enter, and followed me in, and just about the time when all the questioning was about to start about why I was there, my old boss (in real life) from the County showed up. I guess he was now over the operations there. He told them to leave me alone, and I got un-handcuffed.

I handled whatever business in there, and then everything fast-forwarded to the next afternoon [4], where some weird looking dudes in suits (the one guy looked like Justin Timberlake from that one SNL short he did…) were chasing me through this college campus, and I was trying to run after and warn this guy (the alleged perpetrator of the murder) that he was about to meet his end, one way or another…I guess I didn’t believe this guy was the killer. Well, before I could catch him, one of the weird guys in the suits tackled me and knocked me out. The rest of the scenario played out like a movie. The alleged killer, trying desperately to run away from the dudes in suits, fell over a railing into a dried up reservoir, except his long chain he was wearing got caught around his neck, and I watched as he struggled and struggled to get free, but all the color was draining from his face…this is the part that makes no sense (LOL!!! as if anything up to this point has made any sense!). The guy’s legs landed in an abandoned car, and out of the car (I guess) came someone’s hand wielding a knife, which proceeded to cut the guy’s heart right out. And I’m seeing all this unfold but I’m powerless to do anything about it. I felt paralyzed. I was so shaken by what I saw that I woke up…and here I am.

Disturbing stuff. So, here are the songs that were playing (they formed the “perfect” soundtrack). During this post, there were footnotes. Retracing my steps, I was able to put back together where each song began, and at those points I put footnotes.

[1] Madlib – The Sky (Beyond Sight)

[2] The Free Design – Girls Alone

[3] The United States of America – Do You Follow Me

[4] The Isley Brothers – It’s Too Late

I’m thankful to be awake and in one piece. I’m glad that was all in a dream. I’m going back to sleep now….

Till later…

MooT

As I unearth them, I’m going to start posting some of the more “interesting” writings I’ve done over the years. Here’s one I wrote somewhere around April 2000 (before I started putting dates on everything).
This was a series I did by drawing random lines in old textbooks, then making sentences out of the words inside the lines. Yeah, I didn’t pay much attention in High School. This is the kind of stuff I would do. Without further ado, here’s:

Which future; They expect presently to restrict themselves, not become involved in that available to all. Instance: old man and so forth, despite the needs, is a child. A skinny feels guilty if he weighs…while both seem they are trying. Themselves, they do not see the problem. For example, many are unable or unwilling when they’re sober. But they are in a fog. They can also avoid the obvious, really. Since there is, it would be, which would point. Some pleasant experience is to accept the incoming. Reinterpreting that impulse coming from an injury makes them feel good. You imagine it ready to drill you. Developing these opposites reduces pain. In addition, he had his family. During these periods, he became irrational. Any process is normal, mainly caused by oxidation. Oxygen is a fresh development.

Hey, I didn’t say it was going to make sense. Or even have complete sentences. However, I feel that the last sentence really sums it up. Fresh.

Later on….
MooT